By Nathan Eyagu
There is nothing special about a man marrying three women in Africa and staying together with them in one roof but the reverse is polyandry that’s unheard of in the African Tradition Society as it’s an usual and at times considered misfortune.
However, even with such belief of people in ATS, many things are seemingly changing as stories of women engaging in multiple marriages are gradually mushrooming in East Africa.
In a video currently making rounds in the internet, there is a woman who is around the age of 40’s to early 50’s who shocked people after taking in three men to stay with her under the same roof and takes care of all of them since they are unemployed.
Nellie a mother of two who is a car dealer from one of the East African Countries and imports cars from Dubai testifies to have lived with her three men peacefully for three years.
Nellie’s story started after she lost her husband in a motor accident after staying together for eight years, she was left behind with two kids and her husband’s brother, Hassan with whom they lived within the same house.
She continued living with him (Hassan) after her husband’s death, later things changed as they developed affection for each other and later turned out to live as husband and wife.
According to Hassan, the first husband in the house,” After the death of my brother, I continued living with Nellie, I helped take care of the kids as she was so busy with work, she loved me and so we decided to live as husband and wife, she later decided to bring in another man in the house though we didn’t have any challenges as we loved each other.”
“I don’t know why she did it, it’s not that I never used to satisfy her as she never said it to me, it was so difficult for me to accept it since I was the first man,” he added.
After realizing that Hassan was jealous, Nellie decided to talk to Hassan.
“I don’t know how I changed my mind until she brought the third man, we all live in peace and will be ok if she decides to bring in the fourth man,” he narrated while smiling.
Each man has his own room and so does Nellie who also takes care of her three men but during intimacy, she visits any of the men in their rooms or decides to invite any to her room.
“I was single before I started living with her as I just finished my studies and couldn’t find a job, when i met her, she gave me strength, since then I started living with her, she told me the truth of living with other men, for a moment it scared me that it could cause chaos but they welcomed me, she got all of us cars that we drive and provides all our basic needs,” Danny Nellie’s third husband said.
The three husbands also try to get what they can do and once they get money, they bring the money home and use it to get what’s missing.
“It wasn’t easy at first, I remember the first time we met, I had much stress cause of love, she found me seated alone and requested to talk to me, since I was in bad shape, I also needed someone to talk to and have a drink with, she told me of her story too, we continued being friends and later developed feelings for each other though she was living with Hassan by then, I accepted it too,” Jimmy the second husband narrated.
Nellie testifies that living with three husbands makes her happy and she believes they won’t cheat on her as she is able to provide them with everything that they need and sexually satisfies them too.
The couples have lived happily together for three years though they have no children.
The community believes that Nellie decided to have three men as a way of fighting trauma of losing her husband in a motor accident as she is scared of losing another.
It should also be noted that in 2019, a Ugandan woman who was then aged 36, Ann Grace Aguti who hails from Amugagara, Kumel in Mukura sub-county, Ngora district got married to three men, who all lived in one compound.
This attracted the wrath of her father, Pastor Peter Ogwang alias Ikwenyar of Christ Foundation Ministries, who mobilised clan members to intervene, saying the practice is unacceptable in the Teso community.
However, the men; Richard Alich, John Peter Oluka and Michael Enyaku, confirmed to media that they have no problem with the arrangement as they regarded Aguti as the head of the family, dine together during meals and obey her instructions, including observing the conjugal rights roster.